The truth of the matter is...

This is Louie.

Louis Bernard Swift Waschke.
It's been harder for me to write lately. I love writing about what makes me smile and laugh about life, and Louie, and life with Louie; but lately Louie has been on my mind for a not as happy reason.

Louie's left eye has been bothering him, well, pretty much forever. That is the case with both eyes. This is a part of life, but what I am referring to is since his pressure's been down. After we've had the surgery and glaucoma isn't hurting him anymore. The post-surgery days have been good and there were many, but for the last six months or more his left eye has been bad in a different way.

It's runny and gooey and sunken and small.
Louie's left socket ball isn't much of an eye at all.
Squinting and batting and blinking and winking.
His shriveled eye seems to be constantly sinking.
Deep back in to its socket it goes,
leaving his eyelashes to turn in and scratch him when his lids close.

Example of left eye, sunken and crusty.

Well alright then, that's how I'll describe it.
Forgive me if I'm strange or seem macabre. Please don't let this deter you from reading my blog (no! stop rhyming!). I want this to be a blog about happiness. I'm writing because Louie inspires me, everyday. I'm writing because I think if everyone could be a little bit like Louie, everything would be a little brighter and a little less heavy. Life is what it is and we have no control over what will come. There is no way to anticipate everything life with chuck at you. Louie lives in this very moment and only this moment. and that's why I love him.

Example of right eye, less sunken and clearer

I have been feeling down about the possibility of Louie having his eye removed.
That scenario has been on the table for a very long time. If you've read my previous entries about the surgery you know that we actually brought Louie in to have both eyes removed before discovering our doctor had a less invasive, less expensive and less traumatic alternative. The injections he had in his eyes were amazing! No more pressure problems, no more pain, but the more the eyeballs shrunk the more the left eye looked worse then the right.

It's always been the eye to give him the most trouble, that pesky left one. Damn it. I've said so many time he'd be better off if it was just out of there. I know it's a pretty routine surgery that our vet has done a bunch of times but it's still scary. Because I will chose to let Louie inspire me again, I'm not going to worry about it. I am going to act. My husband and I have decided to go in for a visit and talk about removing Louie's left eye. If it will make him more comfortable than that is all that matters, HE IS ALREADY BLIND! Louie will never be able to see again, his eyes are just for show and a disappointing show at that. Louie is fine with being blind, he's actually happy with it! We will love Blind Winking Louie just as much as I love Blind Louie, and he will love us just the same right back.